Passionate Tribute to...Toast

I Love Toast! It is warm and softly crunchy, makes the house smell good, and is a wonderful comfort food. The Ultimate Toast is easy to prepare, but does require some devoted attention.
The bread. You must start with a quality bread. It should be slightly dense, have some weight to it, in order to stand up to the toppings of butter, margarine, jams, ect. and should not cave in when these toppings are spread across the slices. Whereas inexpensive "airy" bread is desirable for P & J sandwiches, for those of you who like a glob stuck to the roof of your mouth, it does not qualify for the Ultimate Toast. Next the toasting. Now this step in the process is somewhat dependent on your toaster, it is quite difficult to find a toaster that will evenly toast your bread from corner to corner leaving no over or under browned areas, but this can be overcome. You simply must control the dial of your toaster, thats right Just Take Control! If you consistently find one side of your bread light and the other dark, you must interrupt the cycle, pop out that bread, and manually turn the bread around to the other side. This action must be carefully watched however, because if you leave it unattended, it will over cook and create the worst toast nightmare possible, burnt! No scraping will save it, it is "toast" he he, directly to the trash! Other options are rotating the insertion, top to bottom, side to side, whatever is necessary, the effort will be worth the trouble. Now, when you have the perfectly browned bread, let the slices rest on a plate for about 2 minutes. Lay them side by side, stacking will create steam which will cause sogginess, a bad side effect. Then one slice at a time, gently spread your topping on, covering every possible area of the top, paying close attention to avoiding the perimeter, to allow for picking it up without soiling your fingers. The butter, etc. should not melt completely, another soggy effect, but just pale into a glistening covering, while still retaining its original form. Repeat with another slice, after indulging on the first, you will absolutely desire another. Now you may enjoy the ultimate treat. As you perfect this technique you may want to expand into other areas. Chicken salad, ham salad, tuna salad, then BLT's and for perfection Club sandwiches. Still the best is just plain Toast! Enjoy!