2005 An Accounting

I don't really like to make New Year resolutions. If a thing is a good idea to do, you really shouldn't have to wait until the first of a new year to start doing it, and those that do make New Year resolutions, usually don't keep them very long anyway. I prefer to start and or stop things at the time I think is right. So, this post is more a review of the past year of 2005.

I remember it starting with a fear of someone in the family whose job was in jeopardy. Our worries turned out to be unfounded, but that worry clouded the holidays somewhat last year. Then we had joyful news that there would be a new addition to the family! Little news is better than that! Our family has little by little been dwindling, and we did experience a loss this year also,but it also is growing and the new life is a welcome change.

There were many concerns about my Mother and her health and living conditions, many trials and tribulations that took months to conclude, but in the end everything worked out, which was a great relief to us all.

Hi-lights of the year, for me, were travel related. A trip to Arizona included seeing the Grand Canyon and Monument Valley and the Navajo Dinetah, a place I will never forget and hold dear to my heart. It turned out to be not quite the adventure I planned, but all the time I felt it would be an adventure, so I was not totally surprised when it did turn out that way.

The other adventure was a trip to Boston and Old Sturbridge Village. This was a wonderful experience, that exceeded my expectations! If I could travel more, I would LOVE IT! I enjoy the research, history, travel plans, hotel selection, route planning, meals, people and everything about it! This was the trip I used multiple modes of traveling, Car, Plane, Train, Boat, Subway, Bus, Trolly, and Walking, lots of Walking. It was GREAT!

There were not as many entire family gatherings as I would have liked, and I hope to improve on that this year, because we really have so much fun when we all get together. I LOVE that we spend so much time laughing when we are together. I know there are always little aggrevations that come up when a group gets together, but I think for the most part we really appreciate the time we do have together and make compromises to make the most of it!

Of course any time I get to spend with Natalie is WONDERFUL! She makes me smile the entire time, she is so funny and loving and adorable and surprising, you just laugh the whole time you are around her!

In the Fall we all anxiously awaited the birth of Gloria! And waited, and waited, and waited, until finally she arrived! I do think it was because we tried to be better prepared this time, and she just wasn't ready yet. We really are blessed to have another healthy happy baby and mother come through without complications. No matter what things life puts in our path, when you have family that you love and that love you, it gives you strength to overcome all obstacles.

Another Hi-light was the Lan party! Who would have guessed I would enjoy that so much! And thanks to my dear husband, who upgraded my computer, he made it all possible. I'm not sure thats what he intended entirely, but I am grateful none the less.

Christmas this year was the best one I can remember in a long time! Sometimes, Christmas has pushed me over the edge a little. I always have unreal expectations and try to do too much and then get stressed and usually get a cold, but this year, all went very smoothly! And no one was sick!!!! I LOVED IT! I hope everyone else did also!

I couldn't complete this year in review without mentioning the presence of someone new. This person has shared in our family experience and has gradually become part of it. He has contributed help and comfort when needed, shared generously his time and family, and has been fun and accomodating to be with.

There are some things to improve on next year. I would like to spend less and save more. Waste less and accomplish more. Be kinder and less critical. Take better care of myself. Enjoy the good times more, be thankful and take the bad times more in stride. Spend a little more time doing what I should and less doing what I like to do. Give my opinion only when it is asked for. Spend more time planning my life and let my children plan theirs. Learn more computer games. (Oh that contradicts one of the above, so I better stop.) I guess that is enough to work on already.

All in all I really enjoyed 2005. It was a very good year! I can only hope 2006 will be as good! I consider myself a fortunate person, very blessed! I have lived long and abundantly. I have loved and been loved, have children who love and have been loved, I have a daughter-in-law who I consider a daughter, and have grandchildren! I am RICH! In case you didn't think I noticed, I do!

I Had a Great Time, It was So Much Fun!

This weekend I participated in a Lan Party in Winona. The evening consisted of game playing of Medal of Honor and Starcraft Brood War. Most of the players had attended events like this before, and I have had only some experience with this activity, but was looking forward to trying it. I had been preparing and was feeling confident that I would be ready to compete. I knew I enjoyed playing and when I do play the time passes so quickly, I was not worried I would tire of the activity, but still the group consisted of players with skills that surpass mine, so I was somewhat concerned about keeping up.

I thought my nerves would settle down as soon as I fired off a few rounds and they did. Once I started, any hesitation was gone. I just immersed myself in the game and my only thought was to play well and enjoy myself, and so I did. It was so much fun sharing this activity with others who clearly enjoyed it as much as I did. We shared a common goal and by playing in a group were able to try things not possible to do by yourself. Being there, a part of it, was great and it was exciting being able to join in with this group, a rare opportunity!

I want to thank everyone for allowing me to participate, and will gladly return, it's only about 500 miles there and back, if invited. I just want you to know that my quilting group is enjoyable, but this was better!!!

Sad, Strange Day

Today has been quite the day. First I hear that my Brother-in-Law, that I've known for 33 years has passed away. He was part of the older members of the family, and my husband and I, are part of the younger; so we were separated somewhat by time, but also by circumstance.

Next I found out that my Mother, who suffers from Alzheimers, displays behaviors that will require further changes in her living situation and medical treatment.

Each day, it seems, brings new challenges with it, and some days they seem overwhelming, and solutions sometimes are not within our capability. I am a person who likes to fix things, I believe if you can't change them, at least you can do something to make them more tolerable, but some things just can't be fixed. Sometimes your options are very limited. That is when it takes all you have, to fix you attitude.

I know of a saying that says The truly happy people are those who have a source of happiness too deep to be seriously disturbed by ordinary troubles. Now these troubles are beyond the ordinary, but in order to rise above the grief you must try to find some source of happiness to pull you through.

I have many sources of happiness to rely on. I am lucky! But just as I was reminding myself of them, something else unusual happened. While at the home with my Mom, I heard a raised voice calling Help, Help Me!
Just being a visitor, and being accustomed to hearing out of the ordinary remarks while there, I waited a little to listen to be sure of what I was hearing. But then I heard it again, and something made me think this could be something different, so I rose and went toward where I thought the call was coming from. As I went around the corner, I could see inside the open door of a residents' room, and saw a very elderly woman, flat out on the floor. She had to be 90 years old. I went to her and asked if she was in pain and she said no, but she couldn't get up. I went into her bathroom and pulled the help cord, then went back to hold her hand until help came. There wasn't any blood, and she didn't seem to be in pain, and seemed satisfied just to have someone with her. In a few minutes help arrived, and she was checked over. Everything seemed to be in working order, and after more help arrived, she was brought to her feet and sat down on her bed.

It was amazing to me that she was OK. She seemed so fragile and frail, and the staff told me she had fallen only a week ago, and had cut a gash on her head about 3" long. I could see the staples in her head, when we lifted her. And yet, she seemed to just be like rubber this time and bounced back up off the floor. I checked up on her before I left and she smiled and seemed alright, though I'm sure tomorrow she will be sore and bruised, and I wondered why I was meant to be involved in this episode, on this particular day. Who knows, but it did make me feel better in that although there was little I could do for people in my family that I care about; there turned out to be some way I could be of help to a stranger. How weird! Maybe there will be a stranger that will end up helping me and my loved ones in a way I will never know about, in return; and isn't it nice that with all the sadness in this world, there is still enough good in people that you can rely on the help of strangers when you need them! With this truth, there is still always hope!

Fervent Aversion to Princesses

I seem to be noticing an increased awareness of adult princesses. Unless you were born into a royal family, or believe you are a living fairytale or star wars character, there are no princesses! Yet more and more women I meet act like they are one; and they have the annoying attitude that they are entitled to be one.

Lets clarify what I am talking about. I define "princess" by the following criteria.
1. Princesses spend more money than they earn, and they expect someone else to pay the bills for them.
2. Princesses expect to always have their own way. Whatever they want they should get.
3. Princesses rarely, if ever, consider someone else's feelings.
4. There are different rules for princesses than there are for other people.
5. Princesses are not accountable for their actions.
6. Princesses should be taken care of by someone else.

I'm sure you all know women like this and while it may be cute to spoil and pamper sweet little girls, under age 5, it is very unattractive in a grown-up. It is also demeening to most women who take offense to the notion that adult women are not capable of taking care of themselves, much less others.

While the world may think princesses are helpless, I see them for what they really are; controlling, selfish, lazy people. Successful princesses can manipulate entire families who don't even realize it is happening. These are the "high maintenance" women you know. Controlling all the attention is not a sign of helplessness, but authority. They just use an indirect way of demanding it.

The result of these actions, hinder the rest of the female world. By hiding their strengths behind a mask, most men and some women actually believe women are not capable of running corporations; CEO's, making tough or life altering decisions; supreme court justices, running governments; Presidents, or directing the military; generals, or even of thinking logically. Princesses who manage to finance their expenses thru someone else, are perfectly capable of being chief financial officers, they just manage to do it in a converted way.

So to the world I say "WAKE UP"! Stop allowing these women to manipulate you and the world around them. Don't be fooled that they will struggle on their own, they found you didn't they? Maybe they will have to remove their mask of makeup, hair, clothes, cars, and pets and show themselves for what they really are; sweetly manipulative, clever, brats.
Quit hiding and come out into the open and fight like a women!